Thursday, May 16, 2013
11. The Wabbit gets there in Time
St Peter's Square was resplendent with loudspeakers and chairs and the Wabbit looked around. "Looks like we got here just in time for you to give your promotion address," he said. Cardinal Lapin grinned. "Just as well," he said, "this wouldn't be a good one to miss." "What happens to Cardinals when they're promoted?" asked the Wabbit, "more pay?" "Lots of paperwork," said the Cardinal, "but luckily I'll have a private secretary." "I'd like a private secretary," said the Wabbit, thinking of his many lists of things to do. "Wabs, perhaps you should delegate more," said Lapin. "Perhaps I should," replied the Wabbit and tried to think of someone do the job. Then he shook his head because he couldn't think of anyone who would take it. Cardinal Lapin took the Wabbit's paw and smiled. "Perhaps I could slip away occasionally and join your merry band on an adventure." "Your very welcome any time," laughed the Wabbit, "but something's been puzzling me." "Go on," said Cardinal Lapin. "Look Cardy," sighed the Wabbit, "when you were kidnapped by the shadows, why didn't you ask the Almighty to rescue you?" "Oh I did - and he answered," said the Cardinal. The Wabbit stared at him and Lapin squeezed his paw. "He sent you and a Dragon and a Jet Car."
Wednesday, May 15, 2013
10. The Wabbit and the Flying Taxis
Suddenly there was swooping. In an instant, both the Wabbit and Cardinal Lapin found themselves plucked from the falling rope and borne high over the prison. Cardinal Lapin's ears fluttered in the wind and he clutched Terni the Dragon's leafy wings. "Didn't I see you somewhere?" he shouted. "Not me," said Terni, "I was just passing." "I've never met an actual dragon before," yelled the Cardinal. "Oh, how splendid," said Terni with relief. "Shall I take you home?" "What time is it?" asked Lapin. "It's usually later than we think," said Terni. "Well, I have rather important business to attend to," said the Cardinal, "and with all that kidnapping, I quite forgot." "I'll ask the Commander," said Terni. Cardinal Lapin looked across at Turbina the Jet Car. He heard a radio crackle and Terni speak. "Can you get more speed Commander? We have important business." "Right away!" said the Wabbit as Turbina shot past Terni to lead the way. "What about the shadows?" he murmured. Turbina laughed. "'Tis nothing but a magic shadow show, play'd in a box who's candle is the sun." The Wabbit laughed too. "Round which we phantom figures come and go?" He pushed Turbina's thrust lever and a supersonic bang rattled every window in the city.
Tuesday, May 14, 2013
9. The Wabbit and the Big Plunge
The Wabbit and Cardinal Lapin slid down the rope at speed - but
not quickly enough. Sinister shuffling gave way to sinister rushing as two shadows
appeared and made for the rope. "They’ve got cleavers!" shouted the Cardinal, "and
they’ve got cleaving in mind!" "It’s good stout rope. I got it in a ship chandler's store in Civitavecchia," shouted the Wabbit. But the cleavers were razor sharp and they cut
halfway through the Wabbit’s rope. He
felt it give slightly, so he stuck his paws on the wall and slid. That slowed them down
but still they fell. "How high is the
wall?" asked Lapin. "Standard prison issue wall," said the Wabbit. "Too high to look over!" "Where do shadows get cleavers?”
muttered the Cardinal but there was no time for speculation. A sickening snick from above severed the rope completely and the Wabbit and Cardinal Lapin plunged helplessly down the
sheer face of the prison wall. Cardinal Lapin looked up at the Wabbit as they
plunged. "Perhaps I should say a prayer," he said. "Oh, I think I can do better than that," said the Wabbit and he
put his paw to his mouth and made a piercing whistle. "What was that for?" said
Cardinal Lapin. "Taxi!" yelled the Wabbit.
Monday, May 13, 2013
8. The Wabbit and the Rabbit Rope Trick
The Wabbit hopped closer and closer and just as Cardinal
Lapin was about to reach the recreation area, he grabbed him by the arm and
propelled him through a window onto the prison roof. The shadows hovered
threateningly, but appeared reticent to advance near the low wall that marked the edge
of the building. The Wabbit took Cardinal
Lapin firmly by his robes and pulled him to the parapet. "I won’t be a second," he murmured. He delved
deep in his fur, pulled out a long rope and attached it to a small chimney. Then he threw the rope across the wall. Cardinal Lapin looked over and watched the rope coil down further and further. He turned and stared at the Wabbit. "Who? Me?" he gaped. "It’s a rope trick," said the Wabbit. "The shadows will watch the Cardinal
and the rabbit vanish!" "That trick is usually going up, Wabbit. Not plunging down," said
the Cardinal. The Wabbit heard the sinister sound again and snatched a glance over his shoulder. "It’s the rope or
the shadows!" he yelled. "We’re losing a head start. Over you go!" "There’s supposed to be a secret wire in this trick," fussed Lapin, looking over the edge again. "I don't see the secret wire!" The Wabbit smiled and shrugged. "Secret wire?" he scoffed. "Do you think I’m a charlatan?" And he shoved Cardinal Lapin over the edge and down the rope.
Friday, May 10, 2013
7. The Wabbit from The Inspectorate
Wednesday, May 08, 2013
6. The Wabbit & the Prison Inspection
The Wabbit made a lot of noise as he parked Turbina at the prison gates. Then he jumped out and kicked the door. There was silence for a long time so he kicked it again. A bolt drew back and the door swung inwards and a head popped out. "Go away," said the figure. The Wabbit drew an official looking card from his fur and thrust it in the figure's face. "Blue Cross!" he yelled. "Surprise prison inspection under the Geneva Convention!" The figure withdrew and the Wabbit heard murmuring. "It's the Blue Cross," said one voice. "Oh no!" said the other, "I told you this would happen." "Play for time," said another voice. Outside, the Wabbit was humming Jailhouse Rock and stomping his feet impatiently. "I require to inspect sanitary conditions, food rations and recreational facilities," he barked at the door. "At once!" The figure's head popped out again. "It's inconvenient," he said. "Come back tomorrow." The Wabbit struck the door with his paw. "I'll inform the International Secretariat of your refusal, forthwith." "What's your name?" asked the figure. "Commander Hans Blix," said the Wabbit. The head disappeared again. From inside, the Wabbit heard raised voices and an altercation that lasted some time. Finally, the head appeared once more. "You'd better come in, Sir."
Tuesday, May 07, 2013
5.The Wabbit & the Jailhouse Shadows
The Wabbit had just left Tony's place when his radio crackled. He shielded it from the noise of the traffic and hissed, "Commander Wabbit!" The Wabbit heard a fluttering of dragon wings and a peppery voice spoke. "It's Terni the Dragon, I found Cardinal Lapin." "Where is he Terni?" said the Wabbit calmly. The Wabbit could almost feel Terni's hot breath. "He's in an Old Abandoned Prison." "Are you sure it's him? said the Wabbit. "Red clerical garb, white lace trim, sideways pointy ears," said Terni. "That's Cardinal Lapin all right," said the Wabbit. "Shall I swoop, pluck and extract?" asked Terni. The Wabbit thought for a bit and decided against swooping and plucking. "Terni, can you see shadows in the wrong place?" "I can indeed," said Terni. "They're all around his cell." "Then stay clear for the moment," said the Wabbit. "We'll break him out some other way." Terni looked down and saw that Cardinal Lapin had noticed him. But Terni hadn't always enjoyed the best of relations with Church figures, so he waggled his wings like a small plane and shot into the sky. The Wabbit thought for a minute - and then a song came into his head. He hummed it to himself and shuffled his feet and snapped his paws in a most peculiar way. "Everyone in the whole cell block, is gonna dance to the jailhouse rock!"
Monday, May 06, 2013
4. The Wabbit, Tony and the Shadows
The Wabbit decided on his first port of call. "Start with where you know," muttered the Wabbit, anticipating a first rate coffee. "Commander Wabbit! sad Tony. "On vacation?" The Wabbit shook his head. "Kind of," he grinned. "I'm unofficially searching for an old friend." "Cardinal Lapin?" asked Tony. The Wabbit tried not to look surprised. but the Wabbit knew one thing. He knew that Tony knew almost everything that went on near St Peter's Square. "The last time the Cardinal was here, he showed me several tricks," said Tony with a smile. "I'm afraid he can't be found," said the Wabbit. Tony frowned and bent towards the Wabbit. "There are reports of strange shadows." The Wabbit raised his eyes. "Shadows that shouldn't be there," added Tony. "Shadows in the wrong place?" mused the Wabbit. Tony nodded. "And shadows on dark moonless nights. A customer saw the Cardinal going home one such evening. The street lights went out - and suddenly he was enveloped in shadows." "What happened?" said the Wabbit gravely. Tony looked unusually serious. "When the shadows moved, and the lights came back, the Cardinal had vanished." "But every shadow belongs to some thing, some object," said the Wabbit. "Not these ones," said Tony. "I need a coffee," said the Wabbit.
Friday, May 03, 2013
3. The Wabbit and the Lapin Briefing
The Wabbit had correctly predicted the state of the Tiber tow path. There wasn't a soul around - except for a rabbit secret agent, a jet car and a dragon made of food. No-one noticed the powerful reverse thrust of the Turbina's jet engine and no-one heard the Wabbit as he absent-mindedly tapped a jazz rhythm on Turbina's hood. "Commander please stop," sighed Turbina. "What's under there?" joked the Wabbit and he tapped again. "My salad sandwiches," said Turbina. "I'm hungry," said the Wabbit and paused as his stomach groaned softly. "I know why you're here," said Terni the Dragon. "No-one knows," retorted the Wabbit. "Yes, I heard it on the grapevine," said Terni. The Wabbit tapped out the tune on Turbina's hood and started to sing "and I'm just about to lose my mind!" when a sharp hoot from Turbina echoed down the walls. "Ouch" said the Wabbit and he hopped back shaking his paw. "Static!" laughed Turbina. Terni smiled as only a dragon can and asked "What's the plan?" "We'll split up and look for Cardinal Lapin in places he usually frequents," said the Wabbit. "That's caffès, churches and clerical outfitters." Turbina jumped in first, "I'll cruise the streets and look at the shops!" "And I'll fly across the dreaming spires and piazze," said Terni. "Splendid," said the Wabbit. "That leaves the caffès to me."
Thursday, May 02, 2013
2. The Wabbit Jets In
The Wabbit and Turbina the Jet Car flew into Rome at a suitable altitude. "Keep your eyes open for cardinals, Turbina," said the Wabbit. "What do they look like?" asked Turbina, "They're invariably in red," said the Wabbit. "Excellent choice," said Turbina. A short time elapsed while Turbina did things with instrumentation. "Incoming dragon at six o'clock. Commander. Shall I hail it?" The Wabbit's rear sight line wasn't great so he turned and squinted out from the rear window. "That's Terni," he said and he waved. The radio crackled a bit. "He does have a radio?" asked Turbina. "He has one of mine," said the Wabbit. "Then I'll call him with a proper one. "Calling Dragon. This is Turbina the Jet Car. Please identify yourself and state the nature of your business."" "This airspace is under my jurisdiction," said Terni through much static. "I work for Wabbit Command." Turbina muted the radio and addressed the Wabbit. "You do a lot of unofficial things, Wabbit!" "I call it supernumerary assistance," shrugged the Wabbit. "As might be required from time to time, I suppose?" sighed Turbina. The radio crackled again and Terni the Food Dragon cut in. "Turbina Heavy. You're cleared to land on the River Tiber Towpath. Over." "Copy," said Turbina and she spoke to the Wabbit. "Why there?" "There's never a soul around," said the Wabbit.
Wednesday, May 01, 2013
1. The Wabbit tries to leave Quietly
The Wabbit dropped in at the Department of Wabbit Affairs to get Turbina the Jet Car. Then he left as quietly as a jet car would allow. "Quietly," murmured the Wabbit as Turbina's thrust lever suddenly roared. "Might I remind you Commander," said a voice, "that I outrank you." The Wabbit smiled to himself. "Sorry Turbina, I meant to request a little less noise." "That's better," said Turbina. "And I was not informed of this trip." "That's because I'm on leave," said the Wabbit. There was a long silence. "You never take leave," said Turbina. The Wabbit turned right and headed up Via Arsenale. "Just a wee break," said the Wabbit, grinning. "I don't believe you," snapped Turbina. The Wabbit paused for a second. "It's a private mission," he confessed. "It's officially unofficial." "Excellent!" said Turbina, "I could use an outing." The Wabbit breathed a long sigh of relief. "Where are we headed?" asked Turbina. "Rome," said the Wabbit. "Fly or drive?" asked Turbina. "We'll drive and listen to some tunes," said the Wabbit, "and then we'll just fly in." "Just as if we're having a vacation, a little change," said Turbina. "You got the drift," said the Wabbit, "a change is as good as a rest."
Tuesday, April 30, 2013
The Wabbit hears News of a Friend
The Wabbit and Lapinette hopped to a Safe Garden nearby and the Wabbit touched Lapinette's paw. "What up?" he asked with a half smile. "This is on the strict QT," said Lapinette, "It's not official Department business." "The Wabbit nodded but stayed quiet. "It's our friend, Cardinal Lapin," frowned Lapinette. "He's due for a promotion." "Oh," said the Wabbit, "a Chief Cardinal already?" Lapinette made a funny face at the Wabbit and continued. "Threats have been made against him and now he's gone missing." The Wabbit's demeanor changed. He growled the deepest of growls and his paw grasped for some object in his fur. Lapinette's ears twitched as she heard an unmistakable metal click. "I'll hop straight off then," said the Wabbit. "Things to do, cardinals to find." Lapinette sighed. "It's not official, we're not supposed to know." "Never heard a thing," said the Wabbit. "Anyway, I do have leave outstanding." "When do you propose to take it?" asked Lapinette, although she knew the answer. "Immediately immediate," said the Wabbit and he turned to go. "Wabbit!" called Lapinette. The Wabbit turned and looked at Lapinette with the other half of his smile. "Mind your back, Commander," she said in a low voice. The Wabbit grinned. "I've been minding my back so long, I forgot I had a front."
Monday, April 29, 2013
The Wabbit's After-adventure Caffè
After the adventure they all gathered in a caffè for a quick
discussion. "Oh, there you are Skratch, smiled the Wabbit. "I’ll ask The Question." "No
need," said Skratch, "It was a Crazy Cool adventure and none the worse for that!" The
Wabbit looked relieved. "It belonged in no particular genre then?" asked Wabsworth.
Skratch nodded with approval, but Lapinette was impatient to know what to do
with the dark energy creature. "Ghost
Bunny, do you know of any galaxies short of a few singularities?" she enquired. "Well, this one here," said Ghost
Bunny. Lapinette wrinkled her nose. "OK," said Ghost Bunny, mimicking the Wabbit. "Galaxy M85 is sadly lacking." "Just the ticket," said the Wabbit. "I’ll get Quantum the Time Travelling Train
on the job right away." "Can I go along for the ride?" asked Snail. "I don’t get to many galaxies." "Bring back pictures," grinned the Wabbit. "Is it far?" said Snail. "Sixty
million light years," said Ghost Bunny. "Then let the Train take the strain," nodded Snail. Everyone
laughed and broke into conversation - except for Lapinette and the
Wabbit. "Wabbit, something urgent has come up," whispered Lapinette. The Wabbit crinkled his eyes and took her paw. "Let’s go for a hop and you can tell me all about it," he said. So they quietly disengaged
from the merry band and hopped round the corner for a chat.
Friday, April 26, 2013
9. Wabsworth & the Genie in the Bottle
Suddenly the music stopped and everything froze - everything except for Wabsworth and the Dark Energy creature. Wabsworth pulled the bottle from the coat that the Wabbit had given him - and with a quick twist of his paw, he opened the cap. The distinctive smell of amaro was strong enough to fill the tunnel and Wabsworth wondered how the Wabbit had come by the bottle. "Some Gala Dinner that must have been!" he thought, looking at the police label. There was no mistaking the creature's joy. It only had eyes for the bottle and it compressed until it could squeeze through the top. The creature squeezed and squeezed until it was completely inside. And through the glass, Wabsworth could see singularities swirl around until everything was darkly dense. "It's drinking the dregs!" thought Wabsworth and he deftly rescrewed the cap. Wabsworth wasn't sure what would happen, but he reasoned that amaro was digestive and medicinal. "Black holes can only benefit," he thought and he looked round to see Ghost Bunny spooking into her former ghostliness. Lapinette and the Wabbit formally returned heads and Big Blue Snail slid backwards and forwards on the rails in a kind of break dance. "You don't see that every day," thought Wabsworth.
Thursday, April 25, 2013
8. The Wabbit and the Science of Soul
Ghost Bunny haunted into action. The Wabbit had accidentally touched the Dark Energy creature so there was nothing else to do. She became enormous and piercing light shot from her eyes. "Wabsworth! Now!" she shrieked. Wabsworth fired the anti-matter decelerator and everything whirled, shattered and reassembled in a startling scene. The creature became flat and Ghost Bunny began to sing. "Callin' out around the world, are you ready for a brand new wail?" The Wabbit sang back. "Summer's here and the time is right, for dancing on the rails." "Dancin' in the Metro," sang the two Lapinettes. "Slidin' on the rails," sang Snail in the background. Wabsworth couldn't help grinning. "What did you do?" "I'm protecting them with music," wailed Ghost Bunny, "do you have a bottle for the creature?" "Yes, in my fur," said Wabsworth. "When the music stops, everything will change," said Ghost Bunny. "The creature will shrink, and you can trap it in the bottle." Lapinette and the Wabbit swayed sinuously. "All we need is music, sweet music," sang the Wabbit, "there'll be music everywhere." "There'll be swingin' swayin', and records playin'" sang Lapinette, "dancin' on the rails!" Wabsworth rummaged in his fur. "Oh, shall we let them finish?" smiled Ghost Bunny, sweetly.
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