2. The Wabbit and the Fire Without Heat

The Wabbit received a crackly call on his walkie talkie. The Department was anxious for him to confirm, and he set off immediately. He spoke to no-one in particular. "I think it's that mission Wabsworth was on about." Wabsworth's voice chimed in. "The second one - and you should really terminate group calls properly." The Wabbit growled "Out," and shoved the radio in his back pocket. When he arrived, Lapinette was already investigating. The fire had ravaged a pub, but things appeared strange. "Oh. You got here at last." She didn't turn her head. The Wabbit scrambled on top of the borrowed fire truck. "I hope you got a chit for this." Lapinette's voice was cool. "In your filing cabinet, under "e". "For expenses?" asked the Wabbit. "For expedite this immediately," replied Lapinette. The Wabbit paused for a moment. "Isn't that ember hot?" he asked. "That's the funny thing," mused Lapinette. "This was a raging fire this morning, but none of the ashes are remotely warm." She waved a paw through the flames. Nothing happened. "As cold as death's chill hand." The Wabbit shuddered. "I prefer cold as a dead rabbit's nose." "Now that's creepy!" Lapinette smiled and looked worried at the same time. She pointed into the distance. Similar heaps of embers lay scattered. "It appears to be spreading." "And all of them as chilly as the moon?" grinned the Wabbit. Lapinette grunted. "Chillier."

1. The Wabbit and the Electronics Store

The Wabbit bumped into Wabsworth, his android double, outside the electronics store. "Are you on special offer?" joked Wabsworth. "Very funny," replied the Wabbit. He couldn't help noticing Wabsworth's new tattoo, just at the corner of his eye. "New tat?" he countered. "They're all the rage," laughed Wabsworth. "I can fade it out and back at the touch of an internal sensor. The tattoo became invisible and reappeared. "Doesn't that defeat the purpose of permanence?" observed the Wabbit. Wabsworth selected his polychromatic programme. His tattoo flashed then switched off. "I get bored," he shrugged. The Wabbit's shoulders shook with mirth. "Any word from the Department?" Wabsworth guffawed. "You can have a choice of missions. A dull one with plenty of social and environmental meaning." He paused. The Wabbit's ears fluttered. "I've already sorted my stinky rubbish and been to the bottle bank." "Or you can choose a colourful mission with little or no social merit." The Wabbits ears rotated wildly. "The second one sounds good to me. Join us?" Wabsworth flashed his tattoo. "If you can't join them, beat them." The Wabbit laughed. "Your comedy subroutine is improving." Wabsworth leaned back. "I had a lot of fun with that." The Wabbit grimaced. "Let's go into the store. There might be gadgets." Wabsworth grinned and spread his paws. "I don't like the sound of it. Too much negative feedback." Then they laughed and laughed and laughed!

The Wabbit's famed Adventure Caffè

The team advanced on a new Adventure Caffè, which hadn't even been built yet. The Wabbit insisted that the Museo Nazionale di Risorgimento should have one and there was plenty of room. He'd picked out a suitable location and they were on their way to scout it out. Lapinette was so glad to see the Wabbit again, she threw herself at him, paws outstretched. The Wabbit maintained a stoic smile as was his way. Wabsworth showed obvious delight with the exhibition on the future of Torino and traced his paw along the calligraphy of various old adverts. A faint buzzing indicated he was storing them on his vast memory banks. What he intended to do with all the stuff he collected no-one knew, but his memory was huge and that didn't seem to matter. "Retrieval is everything," he murmured. Skratch was considering what kind of adventure the Wabbit just had. "Your ability to ingest or even engulf genres is amazing, Wabbit." The Wabbit smile was almost annoying. "It's a hybrid phenomenon of my own invention." Lapinette snorted. "High art and the Wabbit?" Wabsworth laughed and traced round an area in the display. "You set the paintings free through their own plasticity." Skratch agreed. "They left their boundaries behind." The Wabbit began to hop. Lapinette joined him. Soon they all hopped. "Are we free due to our own plasticity?" asked Lapinette. She rose gently and descended. The Wabbit stopped hopping. One by one they all became still. A dramatic hush fell. "We're certainly free of a drink until we build the new Caffè," whispered the Wabbit.