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Saturday, August 31, 2013
7. The Wabbit and the Bat's Blues
Wednesday, August 28, 2013
6. The Wabbit and the Colour of Sales
Monday, August 26, 2013
5. The Wabbit and the Bat's Choice
The Wabbit decided it was time to put colour to the test and persuaded Bat Diddley, the Vinyl Bat, to go with them to the market. "What lovely shirt colours!" said Diddley, "I must record them at once." The Wabbit shook his head. "You need to be in the moment, Diddley. What colour do you like?" "I like them all," said Diddley. "You have to choose," said Lapinette. Diddley rummaged on the stall without deciding. "I'll record the colours and choose later," he said. The Wabbit shook his head again. "You have to buy a shirt and keep it." "What about that red one?" said Diddley. "It's a little garish for your complexion," said the Wabbit and he steered Diddley across to a claret coloured shirt. Now Lapinette knew that was the colour of the Wabbit's favourite football team, but she decided to stay quiet. "That shirt has particularly excellent hue and tone," said the Wabbit in the manner of a disinterested expert. Lapinette smiled to herself. "Do you know, I think you're right," said Diddley, "it rather suits me." "Then what's it going to be?" asked Lapinette. "I'll take it!" cried Diddley. "This is only the start," grinned the Wabbit.
Friday, August 23, 2013
4. The Wabbit in the Kingdom of the Bat
The Wabbit and Lapinette found themselves transported to a large hall that was completely monochrome - except the colour from a panel of photographs. "Welcome to my Hall," said the large Vinyl Bat. "I do hope I didn't scare you." "Not at all, Mr ..." The Wabbit squinted at the Bat's label in search of a name. "Mr Diddley?" The Bat nodded. "Well Mr Diddley, I'm afraid you've been stealing our colour." Diddley the Vinyl Bat was horrified. "Borrowing!" he exclaimed, "The effect is only temporary. We put the colour back immediately" Lapinette tried to see her left eye without success, but the Wabbit peeked at his glasses and could see the blue had returned. "Then why are you borrowing colour?" he asked. "To record it," said the Vinyl Bat. "We're making a complete record of all the colours in existence." "On vinyl," said Lapinette. "On vinyl," said the Bat. The Wabbit considered. "I still don't get it," he murmured "A complete collection of colours will be available on vinyl," said the Bat in a loud, emphatic tone. He stared at the colours for a second and rotated slightly. Then with a click of his cartridge feet, Diddley the Vinyl Bat returned colour to the panel of photographs on the wall. "Oh," said the Wabbit, "that's groovy!"
Wednesday, August 21, 2013
3. The Wabbit and the Bat out of Hell
The Wabbit and Lovely Lapinette abandoned puzzling out the presence of vinyl bats and took the metro home. And as they hopped down the escalator, they talked about the bats and began to laugh as they batted the whole problem around. The Wabbit sang a few verses from Bat out of Hell but had to stop when Lapinette kicked him on the leg. "I'll be gone, gone, gone, ouch!" yelled the Wabbit. "You're bats in the belfry," giggled Lapinette. "I cant help it, it's my way," said the Wabbit and he held his paws up like wings. Lapinette held her paws up too and they hopped forward in unison. "Go, go, go with a smile!" sang the Wabbit and he hopped forward again. "Batdance! Do it! Keep bustin'!" chanted Lapinette and she hopped too. They hopped up and down and waved their wings and chortled. They were so enjoying themselves, they became quite oblivious to anything around. "I always ask that of all my prey," said a voice. The Wabbit and Lapinette stopped dead and looked at one another. "Did you sing that?" asked Lapinette. "Not guilty," said the Wabbit. He glanced over his shoulder and so did Lapinette. "Uh oh," they murmured.
Monday, August 19, 2013
2. The Wabbit and the Vinyl Bats
Friday, August 16, 2013
1. The Wabbit and the Colour Thief
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
The Wabbit and the Jazz University
Skratch the Cat met the Wabbit emerging from the university and fell alongside. "Hello, Wabbit where were you?" "Oh, hello Skratch," said the Wabbit, "I was just giving a talk on jazz and rabbits." "Really," replied Skratch, "can you give a whole lecture on that?" The Wabbit looked snooty. "Jazz," he said, "is the natural music of rabbits," and he left it at that, as if the statement alone was enough. "How so?" asked Skratch, inclining his head. "Rabbits appear and disappear at will," stated the Wabbit. "Now you see them, now you don't?" queried Skratch. The Wabbit nodded gravely. "And so it is with jazz," he said. "In jazz, there are notes that aren't really there and we rabbits lean on spaces that aren't there." "How do you know they aren't there?" asked Skratch. "Because we can't hear them or see them," said the Wabbit. Skratch's brain whirled. "They're ghosts!" said the Wabbit. "They don't exist as such - we just imply them." "Oh I see!" said Skratch, without conviction. "Well, talking of things that aren't there, isn't it colourless around here?" "Do you know all theory is grey?" said the Wabbit. "You hum it and I'll join in," said Skratch.
Monday, August 12, 2013
The Wabbit's Adventure Caffè
"I'm relieved to see all these people," said Lapinette. "So am I" said the Wabbit. "And now we're back in phase, Skratch can ask the Question." "I will," said Skratch the Cat. "What was that for a short adventure?" "It was all a question of point of view," said the Wabbit. "Who's point of view?" wailed Ghost Bunny. "Our point of view," said the Wabbit. "That's why you got contaminated," moaned Ghost Bunny softly. "Your point of view was strongly attractive to the Dark Energy creatures." "Perhaps our point of view needs to shift," said Lapinette." "Well, whatever you do, don't lose it," said Skratch. "If it got out on its own, it might run amok." "I don't want anyone else to have my point of view," said the Wabbit, "they might go around trying to be me." Skratch paused, then smiled an embarrassed smile. "I saw you by the way." "Where?" said the Wabbit. "At the jazz club," answered Skratch. "Then why didn't you say anything?" asked Lapinette. Skratch hung his head a bit. "We were booking for Michael Bublé." "Oh, he's not so bad," grinned the Wabbit. Skratch gaped. "Are you going through a phase?" "It will pass," laughed Lapinette.
Friday, August 09, 2013
7. The Wabbits in the Quantum Well
Ghost Bunny flew wailing into the air and back, as a cage formed around the Wabbit and Lapinette. The Wabbits flinched as a sudden, massive force pulled them forward, then back, then up, then down to the bottom of the cage. "I was in a washing machine once," panted the Wabbit. Lapinette squirmed. "How did that go?" she gasped. "It was all
right until rinse and spin," spluttered the Wabbit. Suddenly the pulling stopped. "What’s
happening, Ghost Bunny?" shouted the Wabbit. "You’re in a quantum lattice well," said Ghost Bunny. "It will pull you flat again and then you’ll be correctly in
phase." "As much as we ever were," said Lapinette. "We were only going through a phase," mused the Wabbit. "I’ve been waiting to hear you say that for some time," sighed Lapinette
and she kicked the Wabbit in the leg. "I didn’t feel that at all," grinned the Wabbit. "Then I have to make a few quantum adjustments," said Ghost Bunny and she flew around
hauntingly for quite some time. At last she returned. "Here's a wish for the quantum well," she moaned. "How many dimensions would you like to be?" "Just
the usual two," said the Wabbit.
Thursday, August 08, 2013
6. The Wabbit and the Cold Dark Matter
Ghost Bunny floated to a gateway and indicated that Lapinette and the Wabbit should get inside. Then she did something - and what that something was, no-one knew for sure. But a cloud of dancing matter swirled around the Wabbits and when they became visible, Ghost Bunny addressed them both directly. "What on earth are you two up to?" she breathed in a haunting voice. "We don't know," said the Wabbit. "It just happened," said Lapinette. "We're out of phase," said the Wabbit. "I know," said Ghost Bunny, "and that's exactly where you'll stay unless I can think of a solution." "I don't like it here," said the Wabbit. Ghost Bunny thought for a while and then she reached some kind of conclusion. "It must have been the dark energy creatures you fought in the Metro," she wailed. "They contaminated you." "Yuck," said Lapinette and she pawed her shoulders frantically. Ghost Bunny started to moan a low technical moan, full of equations and talk of isotropic inertness and perturbations. "That doesn't get us out," said the Wabbit. "We can't stay in this gateway forever, it's cold," sulked Lapinette. "I'm thinking," said Ghost Bunny. "so please let me complete my research." "What about a Potential Well?" interrupted Lapinette. "Oh, things aren't that bad," said Ghost Bunny.
Wednesday, August 07, 2013
5. The Shadows of the Wabbits
The Wabbit and Lapinette tried to take a Number 9
tram but there didn’t seem to be any. So they hopped a long way through
deserted streets until they came to Pluto Park - in the hope of finding Ghost
Bunny. "She’s usually around here somewhere," said the Wabbit and his ears
fidgeted. "Do you really think she can help us get back into phase?" said Lapinette. "If anyone can, she can," said the Wabbit. Lapinette knew the Wabbit trusted
Ghost Bunny like no other and she nodded quietly. "There she is!" shouted the Wabbit.
Lapinette waved frantically and so did the Wabbit. "Over here, over here, Ghost
Bunny!" they yelled. Ghost Bunny seemed to look at them, then turned away. "No,
no!" shouted the Wabbit. "Help! We’re out of phase!" Ghost Bunny paused and turned
back. She stared for a while then shook her head. "I’m sure I saw something," she
murmured. "No, just a trick of the light." She shrugged just like the Wabbit and started to turn away again. "Lapinette,
look!" shouted the Wabbit, "we have shadows! Jump, jump!" They both jumped and
waved and their shadows danced merrily. Ghost Bunny swung around. "Wabbit?
Lapinette?" she said. "Ghost Bunny!" screamed the Wabbit. Ghost Bunny
couldn’t hear a thing but this time she gazed shrewdly. "Something weird is going on," she decided.
Friday, August 02, 2013
4. The Wabbits seem to be Ignored
The Wabbit and Lovely Lapinette headed for the Torino Jazz Club
which did rather a good carrot aperitivo - and it looked as deserted as everywhere else in the city. But to the Wabbit's surprise, two familiar figures came into view. "Look there’s
Skratch!" shouted the Wabbit. "And Wabsworth, your android double!" yelled
Lapinette. The Wabbit gazed, because something seemed strange about them. "Lets join them and ask what’s going on," suggested the Wabbit. They
chased after them shouting and waving their paws. But no matter how much they shouted and waved, Skratch and Wabsworth
paid not the slightest attention whatsoever - and continued into the Club. "Skraaaatch!" yelled the Wabbit with the loudest voice he could muster. "Waaaabsworth!" screamed
Lapinette. But it was as if their friends could neither hear or see them. The Wabbit turned to Lapinette and touched her lightly on the paw. "You can feel that, can't you?" he asked. "Of course I can," said Lapinette and she poked the Wabbit in the ribs. "Ouch" said the Wabbit. "So what's happening?" asked Lapinette. "They're OK, I'm afraid it's us," said the Wabbit. "We can't be seen?" said Lapinette. "Or heard," said the Wabbit. "Because something's thrown us out of phase."
Thursday, August 01, 2013
3. The Wabbits in the Deserted City
"You’re on the flower bed," said Lapinette. "Am I?" said the Wabbit. "There’s nobody here to tell me
off," he remarked and his ears swayed gently. "Get off anyway," said Lapinette. "OK," said the Wabbit and he looked all around. "It’s deserted
just like the Marie Celeste." "We’re not a ship in the Atlantic Ocean," said Lapinette. The Wabbit shook his
head. "Look over there at that caffè," he said. "I can see an espresso machine steaming gently - just as if everyone vanished into thin air." "That never really happened on the Marie Celeste," said Lapinette. "Didn’t it?" queried the Wabbit in a disappointed voice. "What happened to the crew?" "Oh, the
crew vanished all right," said Lapinette. "What’s your theory then?" asked the
Wabbit. "Pirates," said Lapinette. The Wabbit laughed. "And they never took the cargo
of alcohol destined for Genoa to fortify wine?" Lapinette was forced to nod in
agreement and she looked around some more. "Better radio in," she decided. "There’s no-one there," said the
Wabbit. "Not even static. Silent as the day is long. Completely dead." "I get the
drift," said Lapinette. "I can only think of one thing to do," said the Wabbit. "Let’s have an aperitivo." "Self service?" said Lapinette. "The only way to go," grinned
the Wabbit.